I don't see how someone can be paralysed by fear of death. You understand that after you're dead nothing matters anymore, right? Why worry about the inevietable that is out of your control, worry about life. If all you do is worry about death then where is the fun in living?

My death is not important to me at all, but my life is something I can actually do something about. Anyway, just remember that the older you get the more you'll beg for death. Enjoy yourself while you still have your origial hips, and know that death will ultimately be a sweet relief.

And dying early, again, it's hard to care about that which I have no control over or knowledge of. Doesn't matter to me that I'm dead, if I'm dead.

Could it be that people who say that they are not afraid of death, have come to terms with what you are describing?
My personal beliefs is that when we die, our "mind"; our "conscientiousness" ceases to exist, therefore, I (when I die) will not miss anything, because I have no capacity to do so.
The fact is, what scares me more is someone else dieing. Because, then I am in a position that will I miss them. I grieve for their potential lost and my own desire to see them.

With those thoughts in mind, I try to make the best of what I have now.