As an SMI I have a question to others.
Are you fight or flee or are you all just cowards, afraid of pain.
Ever since the neighbors found out what I am.. they have all avoided talking to me. They are afraid of me. Even my past friends have abandoned me in fear. What is it that makes you all so afraid? Why do you fear?
Now my bed is cold as my girl is back in a ward getting some nice medication to sedate her. All I get are mood stabilizers and PTSD meds.. which are freaking awesome!
The average person seems afraid of pain and possible conflict. I have had a few engagements of hostility lately and all of them chose to avoid me and flee.
Just what do you people think is going to happen? Don't I deserve to have friends as well? All I can do is watch them run away from me. Before they knew they were fine and now that they know.. I am only welcome in circles of bi polar function, it seems.
I find myself lonely lately. My bed is cold and the taste of life, while there, is not much. I miss my girlfriend dearly. As a psychopath herself.. we are great together. But divided.. I feel sad as she gets all the joys of a mental ward while I am stuck with you creatures. Unlike me she has killed many people. So she gets to go to a fancy ward. I was sent to a nice one before but not like hers. They have better food.
The difference between an extreme manic and a psychopath is killing. We are each the same until one of us kills one of you. Then that one becomes known as a psychopath while the other remains.. well as I am.
Without her... I feel empty. Nothing brings me pleasure like being with her. Also I miss the 2-3 a day sex... and light spooning... and playing underhanded tricks together on other people and then bold face lying about it. It makes me smile to think about all we have done. But for the next.. possibly few weeks.. I am again.. alone.
So what do you do? Fight or flee?
They flee... I know you all just run away like the rabbits you are. Your kind.. always so weak and timid. Only the bi polar deserve to live. The unipolars can all die as well.
All of you average people.. so boring. Don't worry. I will bring life to your otherwise dead existence.
Oh and I'm Catholic now. The path I walk is surrounded by weakness that is this worlds people. Very few of you deserve to live. My pregnant girlfriend... I remember now what love is. Wrath taken from me, I can only see the berserks rage. God has cured me of so much.
If you feral creatures weren't so ignorant... you wouldn't fear us so much. Do you not realize it is your fear that compels us? Careful not to spill blood, Hexi. You may its taste rather appealing.
We are the children of God. To be celebrated in Heaven as we are feared on Earth. -Zenemy
Whitewolf, are you also Zenemy?
Cause if you are. I just wanted to tell you that you once wrote to me in a matter that was full of sympathy and kindness, and with more humanity then most would. I didn't see or feel a monster there. Perhaps you are. You can even tell me I'm a lower creature than you now, or tell me to fu*k off. But it still doesn't change what you did for me. Be well.
Zenemy, MTX, Whitewolf... I have a lot of names.
I don't take pleasure in watching the weak suffer. There is no sport in that but this "be well" thing.. that has got to go. It keeps reminding me of demolition man... which was kinda cool back in the day.
Then don't be well. Whichever pleases you. :)
I liked the coherent wolfie better. Also, i do ejoy spilling blood, mine or others. Get's the blood pumpin.
I find myself hesitant on the wording...because I am one of those weak average normals...but I do agree that the bipolars do rule in many things. Just like gay men and fashion:-)
I am sorry that you miss your girlfriend. Loneliness sucks. But you will be back to your old self with her before you know it. You like the rush and maybe that is what you need, in moderation.
On another note...
I appreciate your caring posts. I have emailed you before on that(by private email) ....You obviously have kind sides to you. I choose not to flee, I have a certain respect for you, but you are a bitter pill I would think to some.
Question: were you shewolf yesterday? Just wondering.