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Should we get counseling?

I am wondering if I should pursue counseling with my fiance. We have been "together" for 9 months, which I know seems quick, but we have known each other our entire lives, and when we started dating, everything just seemed "right". It never felt quick to us. The problem now is, there are serious trust issues between us. He has issues in general with trust (pertaining to everyone in his life). He really doesn't have any friends because of this and even distrusts his own family and I. He has started therapy recently at my urging. I just don't know if it is worth pursuing for us as a couple. I do love him, there is absolutely no doubt about that, but wonder if there has been too much damage and hurt done to our relationship because of his trust issues and how he handles it at this point for us to get back to being happy and secure together. For the past few months I have had trouble feeling romantic or passionate feelings for him. To complicate things, I have a seven year old son from a previous relationship who has become very close to him over the past several months. I love us as a family together, and I feel we are great together as a family and as a team, but there doesn't seem to be a "spark". Anymore I feel like he is a very good friend but can't bring myself to feel much passion or romance for him. I think many things have contributed to this problem. A big part of it was when we found out I was pregnant a few months ago and he did not react well. He told me it would ruin his life. I ended up miscarrying and afterwards he told me he would have been there and would have been excited, it just scared him. I don't consciously feel angry towards him about it or upset about what happened, but I do feel like around that time is when I stopped feeling the same about him. I have also caught him going through my things and email and cell phone calls and text messages on several occasions. In addition, I am a very social person and I have a lot of friends. I don't go out often, but occasionaly my three closest girlfriends and I like to go out for dinner or I will meet one of them out for a drink. I've virtually stopped doing this altogether because of how badly he reacts. For lack of a better term, he freaks out. He texts me the entire time I'm gone, accusing me of not wanting to be with him and asking me why I want to be any where but with him. You would think I do it every week instead of once every month or two or that I just do it rather than plan it a week in advance and give him time to warm up to the idea. Like I said, I do love him, which is what makes this so hard, I just don't know if I can feel the way I should about him again. He certainly does all he can by bringing me flowers, being affectionate and the like. I'm honestly just tired of it (the distrust and not feeling a romantic connection). I know every relationship eventually loses the spark and settles down, but is it normal for it to have happened so quickly? What do you think we should do?

Re: Should we get counseling?

Honestly, I think you should go with the counselling if that that's what you think you'll be comfortable with.

I think it'd be your best option right now. :-)