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Re: how is called this philosophy of life?

well, that was a great think-shifting about your parents. just being positive and looking the bright side of things, and don't look the bad stuff. i had an unhealthy family relationship until i got out of my house, at the age of 15. 2 years i used to hate them. now i neutralize my anger towards them with: "i learned to defend myself, and to be smarter than average people because of all things that hurted me" as an old quote said "you learn the best from the hardest falls".
But this thought didn't happen until i proyected and revenged all that anger with others.

im 19 years old by the way, and im still concreting what i really want, what i need, and how will i get it. thats the reason of my post "how is called this philosophy of life". im still concreting it.

When you refer to "shut down" what do you mean? shut down your emotions to not get hurted?

Re: how is called this philosophy of life?

My previous posts on this forum have been just to be anooying and ruffle some feathers but you brought up a nice idea, to be honest for a change. I admit that wearing a persona is tiring at times.

First, to go slightly off-topic, English is my 3rd language. I'm also not much older than you, i'm 25.

It may be that, because your vocabulary is lacking in certain areas, you have a hard time expressing yourself and that's why, to me atleast, you come across as someone seeking attention. I've been on various forums and lot of the time people go there to proclaim mental problems and personality disorders for amusement and to get attention, so i take posts like yours with a handful of salt.

I wasn't trying to be offensive or insult you, i called it as i saw it, intentions don't translate well in pure written language, i know. I don't wear a persona in a forum like this and it's gotten me bans in the past but i don't really mind.

Now, to actually respond to your post. Again you are trying to point out your sociopathic traits, to a diagnosed one at that, why? I'm not seeking a simple answer like "i'm trying to make a point", i'm asking because i'm curious why you want to point it out, in a separate paragraph no less. Do you, yourself, even know why you want to make it so very clear that you're a sociopath?

On to other things. There are VERY few people in the whole world who don't think about their own benefit, it's the norm in our western society where EVERYTHING has a price. Human life goes cheap these days, as an example. Also, everyone pretends to be something they are not, depending on the occasion just to fit in for the same reasons you posted, there is nothing "sociopathic" about that. Every sheep wants a herd because life is scary and stuff.

I'm curious about another thing though, what do you consider as happiness? You say you want to be "happy" but i'm not really sure what you mean by that. Do you mean an easy life, where you don't have to put in effort to be fed etc? Or something more profound, like being at peace with yourself?

Again, i might come across as being rude but that is not my intention. I merely want to ask you questions without trying to gratify your existence, which seems to be the norm in discussions like these.

I know this next bit has nothing to do with anything, but i felt like sharing something about myself into the discussion.

As an example of my behaviour, i've used and/or abused every single person in my life, in one way or another, wether it was for money, sex, drugs or just to hurt them emotionally for amusement. The funniest thing is, most people don't even realize it and to this day some people i've used think i'm their best friend. I find people revolting in how naive and unintelligent they are. People like that deserve whatever comes their way.

Re: how is called this philosophy of life?

Due to shortage of time, I have only read a couple of the posts in this thread but let me just say this. Diego, if you truly believe or know that you have conscience and empathy, and you attempt to wall them off(trying to be someone else), just please be aware of the consequences of doing so. Because sooner or later, the walls will probably come tumbling down and the "you in the future" will have to deal with many of the things that you have done in the past.

And from personal experience, it is not simple because you will likely develop another personality and to revert to the "original you", will take quite some time. You will probably face identity confusion, have trouble maintaining normal relations and even a normal life as you start shifting from one personality to another. Your reactions and behaviour will probably confuse, surprise or even horrify others. And in the worst case scenario, people might think that you are completely nuts and try to admit you into an institution for a few months to a few years.

In short, it would be like having 2 or more of you inside your mind, all having their own independent thought processes and reactions towards various situations and other humans as well as yourself.

And as someone who has more than just 2 personalities, I actually am unable to have much bonds with society at all. My behaviour fluctuations and so on, mean that I'm barely functional at times.

So, if you truly value your own existence and sanity, you're better off trying not to pretend to be someone else, while you still retain awareness of "yourself"(the original Diego).

There... I hope that didn't sound too confusing!

If you want something less confusing, try this explanation(minus the astrology parts):
http://kenoath.wordpress.com/2009/02/17/secondary-personality-type/

Re: how is called this philosophy of life?

Dee.
im aware that i just have conscience when i eat junk food, drink or smoke too much.. But thats because i have narcissistic traits. and i trained myself to feel guilt after doing this, to be in good shape. i developed a conscience in my food and exercise.

im aware that empathy its why the world is where we are, working in teams, but it didn't work for me in my society. i never have tried to be someone else, i just adapted myself to the world. its the law of species, adapt or die. if i had born in a society with good people, a good family, then i wouldn't be a sociopath, im also aware of that.

Even if i wanted to change to what you call "normal behavior person" i wouldn't find it difficult. I know the social rules, people, and i can be seen as the most empathetic person in my social group. people see me as a charismatic, empathetic, trustworthy friend. i have won with the time the love of the people. all that i do affecting them is under the radar. i'm completely in control of what i do, i would never need an institution.

i create easily bonds with people, so i'm not in your case with double personality. People search me to talk, and people like me. i think you proyected yourself in me, as i don't fit in any of the things you said.

thanks for dr robert for creating this forum to share thoughts.

Re: how is called this philosophy of life?

You really just have to find your own meaning.

Stop using your little human brain to try and decode the whole bloody universe! It's probably impossible! You can't posses or percieve the whole objective universe (which we are nonetheless a part of)in your subjective mind!

You wont know what happens when and after you die until it actually happens, so until that bridge comes, it would be arrogant to presume what happens when the body croaks (how could anyone that hasn't experienced it say what happens or not?) so stop worrying about it, death is a just an inevitable part of life and everyone has one.

You need to find soemthing to give you meaning so that you enjoy and have a genuine aptitude for. So many people wander round in circles as they have all this enrgy and potential but it's going in the wrong direction. Find that direction, get connected to your inner self and start actualizing! Follow your heart and when and if you choose to have or not havbe kids or whatever it will be because you FEEL you want to or don't want to.

I used to feel like you, so I thought 'well I'll kill myself then if it;s all pointless and I have to suffer.' But I didn't want to kill myself, i like myself, I'm okay. So I thought -

'Right then, if I'm giving myself a choice of thinking it's all pointless and topping myself because of it or living, then I might as well do exactly what I want with my life if I was going to kill myself anyway! So if I'm not going to kill myself The opposite is life and doing or trying to do whatever I want with it, I might as well, as it is the only alternative. It is not life that becomes worthless then when you think that, it is all the preconcieved notions you have of it or have been force fed by others!! I know do exactly what pleases me as long as it doesn't upset others. I moved to Asia to teach English, huge gamble, leaving my country, moving to an anlien culture where I had no friend etc. It's been 5 yrs now and mostly great and i have made some of my best friends in the world here, though it was tough adapting for the first cpl of months... I will save up to stop working and write and act...

I learned to embrace the general objective pointlessnes! Because that means there is nothing from stopping you being your true self! I believe this was at the heart fo Jean Paul Sartre's philosophy (though worded differently.) And through it I found subjective meaning and 'pointfullness,' if you'll allow me to create the word...!

I thought

'Well if it's all pointless and I am going to die and can have no idea what happens after that, or if there is a point but humans lack the faculties to work it out and understand the whole universe (quite a daunting task no..?) that's brilliant! No need to conform and have a house and mortgage and 2.4 kids! I'll take a gamble and follow my true instincts and desires (while at the same time being realistic, ie if I turn out to be a bad writer or bad actor, then I'll need to follow a new direction.)

Find your own point!

Not to say that my life is perfect and I continue to learn to improve myself and cope etc, but I guess you get my point. cr@ppy things will still happen from time to time, there will be setbacks and rough times etc. But these will happen ANYWAY, so best to brave them (and learn to cope and deal with them better) whilst iving your life for yourself in a way that makes you happy rather than sitting around thinking about nihilism or whatever!

I can give an example of this. I gambled a lot the past 2 yrs. I blew about 35 thousand pounds which I was trying to save so I could quit full time work and write and act. I didn't get in debt, but I had to eat a lot of tuna and spaghetti lol and basically was wasting every penny of my salary other than rent and bills... First few times I blew over a grand a session I would be depressed severely for days, maybe weeks. But then I just thought - 'Ah what the heck! So I've lost that money, that just means I have to work an extra 2 yrs to make it back before I go on to do what I want. this was what it was and is a chapter fo my life now, which to be honest I enjoyed a lot and no-one but my bank balance was hurt in the proccess... so instead of thinkig I lost a huge ton of money, I just figures, I;d just cost myself some time mostly in which case I'm still young and healthy and the gambling was most likely a neccesary proccess I had to go through as part of my development, so I owned it insted of trying to disown it. Now I know I have a year left before I can start doing exactly what i want to try career wise, but feel like it's no biggie because I've let go of thoughts like 'I'm in my mid 30's and don;t have a mortgage and may never make any money from writing or acting etc...' As long as I have decent food, a couple of good friends and an okay roof over my head - you know what? I'm fine.

Milan Kundera wrote an awseome line in his novel 'Imortality'

"I THINK therefor I am is the statement of an intellectual who understands toothaches. I FEEL therefor I am is a truth much more universaly v alid and it aplies to everythig thats alive..."