Thank you for being specific Base. And I must tell you that I believe you are selling yourself a bill of goods if you think anything you have said means that you have to become someone you are not, or that you should be starved for love. Nothing you shared proves that you are insufficient and that you must be frightened about what will happen to you after college. I also suspect that you are deriving some sort of psychological benefit from this “I’m not worthy” story you are holding onto. On some level, you believe it serves you. You are hypnotizing yourself friend. Snap out of it!
If only you could see beyond the story running in your mind. You’d see just how ok you actually are!