am 15 years old, i come from a family with a history of mental disorders not major ones, a cousin wit aspurghis syndrome, most of my family is dyslexic, and a lot of them are or were substance abusers, my parents divorced when i was young.
ive had problems with friends like ive been at the point where i wanted to severely hurt/kill them for no reason, and the impulse just comes out of nowhere, also the same happens with animals, i get a strong desire to kill or hurt them, when they have done nothing wrong, i have been able to keep my impulses under control,oddly enough the only thing that stops me from doing it is not the fact that their my friends or there animals, its just the fact that, its against the law to do so, i dont care about people, or if i do its at such a limiting point where it just doesnt matter, i lie constantly, i fake emotions to get out of situations that are bad, ive even done drugs,(speed, meth, cocaine,weed, random pills, whatever i could get) and well that didnt do much really, besides hurt me physically, but i have no problem lying to people to get what i want, or to get them to do somthing, i know its evil or wrong but i just dont care that it is, as long as i dont get caught.
this is for curiosity's sake on my part, not out of any real desire to seek help, i just really want to know if this is a problem or not.