This is 'merica. M'kay. Alright. Okay, Allrighty then. Looks like we're on the same page. Cool beans
I'm a 16 year old male, average in most respects. Here's my problem: I believe it's called transvistic fetishism or something like that also known as crossdressing. I have never cross dressed and i don't think i ever will, but the desire to is driving me mad. I am able to suppress the desire and live without it seriously bothering me for weeks at a time. Sure, a thought or two might pop into my head if the situation brings forth those feelings, but i just let them fade out of my mind and life is good. But ultimately, this peace will shatter and my mind won't let me escape the thoughts and the urges become stronger and stronger. It's like a splinter in my brain and although I have a strong will and self discipline, I'm afraid that someday i will act upon it. I don't want to hear how 'it's ok' or 'plenty of guys do it, don't worry'. This desire is antithetical to who I am. If you really feel the need to explain to me why I should just accept this (as everyone else I have asked does) then do what ya gotta do. But i doubt you'll change my mind.
All i want to know is if there is anything i can do for myself to eliminate or further suppress this fetish. Now, you might be tempted to think that things such deeply embedded at the core of someone's psyche such as sexual desire are unalterable. For the most part I would agree, but, I think this is different. When i was young, maybe four or five, my cousin used to babysit me. I remember that a few times she dressed me up as a girl, because she thought it was cute. A few months ago I was reading about Freud's theories of the mind and i connected the dots between my feelings now and my early childhood. I think this fetish was contrived in experience, and can, therefore, be dissolved through experience. In other words I don't think it's a fundamental part of who I am. I'm pretty confident that I can live the rest of my life denying this desire, but I think it would be easier if this desire didn't exist. If there's any way I can help myself, please reply.