Has this site died?

Partly it's suffering from winter. Even here in the sunny southwest, I haven't found a chance to get out in the buff.

However, it's also a fact that there hasn't been much in the way of new blood for quite some time. Why not share something interesting to get the ball rolling?

Hi Dak (and everyone),

No, it's not dead. But it's really, really quiet. Maybe everyone is hibernating.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!

Sunny

Hibernating is a good way to put it!

Our resort closed last month. We still meet up with our nudist friends; but mostly in "textile settings." It's ok though; our friendship extends beyond just be naked around each other - we enjoy each other's company dressed too. We're talking about having a "naked dinner" sometime this winter; we'll see. Entertaining guests at our home is something my wife hasn't done naked yet; so it's something we'd have to discuss further.

At any rate, Happy Thanksgiving!

Hey Group: Dak, DipperDave,SunnyDay, Nudony:
Odd that you should mention that about this site, Dak.
Yes! Thankful. Just this morning when I woke up, I realized, "Hey, wow! I'm still alive.
Just a week ago, Linda hugged me as we waited for the coffee to brew and bragged on me. So, no matter what, it's great to be alive.

Not a lot! I check in occasionally, but I don't volunteer much unless there is something to respond to.

Living in cold Calgary, AB, Canada, there's not much naturism around here! However, we do have a club which occasionally meets for beach (summer) or pool (winter) visits now that Covid seems to be an everyday part of life. No, not for me - the incidence of Covid + influenza + RSV is too much risk for me!

Speaking of Covid, there's no personal testing or publication of results here, which masks the incidence of the disease. I look at this site:
https://covid-tracker.chi-csm.ca/
for information derived from the incidence of disease in municipal wastewater. It is scary! Look for similar information from your local academic and public health sources.

On that scary note - Happy Thanksgiving to all our American neighbours.

If we are doing roll call, I am definitely present and definitely alive!
I am in the process of moving, so packing boxes and putting stuff in storage cuts into my naked time and time sharing stories here, but when it is all said and done, it will shave at least an hour off my drive time to my favorite place to socialize with our fellow naturists. That will make it a lot easier for me.

Thanksgiving was full of family time in person and over the phone. Good food too!
Blessings to everyone here!

Ramblinman - I'm also in the moving mode. I've been living in my mother's house for the last five years and I have given that house to my grandson & his wife and moving back into my house on the backside of the 40. I didn't know how much a house setting idle for five years could go down. But the good part of being back here in the woods is that I get a lot more naked time!

My first great granddaughter was born yesterday! She's a little thing & cute as a button - 5 lb 13 oz & 19.5 inches long. She already has her daddy, pawpaw & me wrapped around her little finger. PapPaw is ready for the baby sitting when the grand-daughter-in-law goes back to school and the grandson is working.

If I remember to.....I try to log in and see if there is anything interesting to read here. But sometimes it can be months between visits...and seldom comment. I fondly remember reading Sunny's stories so so long ago now. 15 years? 20 years?

Since we retired the old hot tub to the dump two years ago, my only clothing optional days come during my vacations to Sint Maarten/St Martin.

I am on Facebook and we have a SXM Naturism group. Of course, FB rules apply. And the focus is on SXM (that's the airport code). So posts ...ideally...should be SXM related, but some occasional latitude is permitted. It does have regular posts. Frequently, multiple per day. Club O is still in ruins, buy Cedric keeps the beach operations(chairs, umbrellas, and Perch restaurant/bar) going there. Love Happy Bay and Cupecoy as well.

And we have a "SXM Exposed" group on MeWe where more latitude is permitted, but tends to have a lot less activity.

So feel free to look into those if any have an interest.

Well.... Nothing really NEW, but yeah it's pretty dead so I'll throw this out/in.

I thought about adding this to the mutually nude thread from a while back, but this is as good of a place as any. The general agreement was that in traditional social nudity situations/venues, uniformity is desirable. And I have no disagreement with that.

Having said that, I've posted over the years stories of being nude when others were not, and being completely comfortable with it. BeachBunny was quick to point out that being male gave me a "luxury" in that regard that a woman would never consider. And we all "get it".

Anyway one that comes to mind that I may not have mentioned was a late 90's work trip that took me past Crossville Tennessee when Timberline Lodge was open as a "traditional-family" naturist resort. It eventually changed hands, catered to swingers, and recently closed after a fire.

But the Monday morning I visited there were few guests and about as many staff. When I walked into the office (nude) I encountered the new office person on her very first day in her new job. Wearing a skirt and blouse. It took several minutes before we determined that she'd have to consult the owner as to the location of the cash box, to give me my change! During that time I felt not uncomfortable, but perhaps a little excited at the incongruity of being nude in a resort office with a clothed lady! And the "vibe" from her- quite subtle but unmistakable nonetheless- was that my presence was "appreciated". When I returned an hour or two later I received a warm reception one might say.

The rest of my visit I swam and sunbathed as one would expect. Once again perhaps this is one of those situations that "works" for a guy and not a gal. I'm not trying to be provocative or sensational. BB has stated correctly that men and women can and should enjoy seeing each other. Well, I think that the woman in perhaps her first hour of the new job enjoyed seeing me, and I enjoyed being seen. Sort of a "that's my story and I'm stickin' to it" thing.

Back to work... Maybe more later.

So... Here's where I'm going with this. Whether it really adds up to anything is anyone's guess...

I learned the VERY hard way in a marriage that crashed and burned that not all people perceive the human body as we do: created by God, inherently beautiful, inherently without shame, inherently good.

Many "Christians" hold the prude/ pornographic view, that nudity is inherently shameful and somehow tolerated by God for procreation and occasional marital relations. "Been there, done that, got the t-shirt". But trust me, a couple can share a list of "values" as long as your arm but be doomed in the end if one is not ashamed of what the other sees as inherently shameful.

So I suppose that I perhaps confound some readers here, with my suggestion that one can be casually nude in a variety of life situations where others- friends, family, or even strangers sharing a stretch of remote beach- accept our lack of shame while they ponder the what-if of trying it themselves. For me it is part of really being secure in my identity of someone not ashamed of my body.

There are different dynamics that can occur when "the clothed meets the nude." It can be deemed "uncomfortable" when the "nude" feels "vulnerable." As Marc-Alain Descamps puts it: "In other words, a nude person in front of dressed people may feel somewhat exhibitionistic and perceive them as voyeuristic. That creates an imbalance that results in emotional discomfort."

But that's not always the case. The story that comes to my mind is when my ex-wife interacted with - and befriended - a clothed, very reluctant newbie wife at our non-landed club (I've shared this story somewhere else here before). The woman was clearly in awe of my wife interacting completely naked with her - with no apparent embarrassment. I don't think she'd ever experienced having a "normal chat" with a naked "stranger." That dynamic, far from making my wife self-conscious, actually made her feel confident and empowered. She liked that her "naked confidence" was appreciated.

It's really about how the clothed person "sees" the naked one. If he or she sees the naked person as "amusing" or "shocking"; the naked person will often feel it and become self-conscious. But if the clothed person sees it as an expression of freedom or confidence - and can appreciate it as such; I think it can actually be an empowering experience for the "nude."

Interesting you should mention there hasn't been much "new blood" here in a long time. I was deeply affected in a profoundly positive way when I first read Sunny's stories years ago, when I was wrestling very seriously with my own concept of bodies and the appopriateness of nudity. I have read portions of the message board and check it every once in awhile but have never posted myself. Might be interesting to introduce myself a bit sometime and ask some questions. They would be coming from someone who has been profoundly blessed by wholesome nudity, coming from a background where what was very much NOT a thing--and yet not a full convert either. I definiely still have some strong reservations, and to be honest I guess I haven't really given you all a chance to answer on your own terms because I thought I knew what you would say... But, perhaps some fresh conversation might be in order? It would take a lot of courage for me to be intellectually honest with you all, because I don't think we agree on everything, but uninhibited, normalized, innocent, social nudity remains high on my "I wish I could do that" list.

Also, I COMPLETELY understand Sunny's need for internet anonymity, but I wish I could really thank her for the gift she has given many of us with her thoughtful exposition of what nudity has meant to her and her family. I know it has helped many of us productively process this in ways we couldn't really articulate on our own. Thank you!

Hi, Group:
Before I, myself, even knew that nudity could be acceptable socially; before I even knew that going barefooted out of my house could be permissible, I very carefully put on the proper amount of "wraps" so I could be allowed to go out and join the crowd.
Following a hip replacement, advised to go barefooted when I could, for therapy, I was converted to nudistry.
It took me the whole morning.
Of course, with any new endeavor, there were adjustments to my understanding needed. In the military, a new recruit doesn't just barge into battle. There's some training involved.
As a Christmas gift to the members of Sunny Day's extended family, may I offer a challenge to each of you?
How did you get started?
In this durable website of ours, which Sunny Day started, there is a section "My Friends' Writings."
I was converted twelve and a half years ago. A few of you may have been raised as naturists to some degree. Most of us had to be struck with enlightening,.
We don't really need new blood. We just need to look at naturism in some new way. What drove you?
Merry Christmas to all!

Thanks, Jim, for your comments mentioning me. I've been away but logged in today and found three different threads mentioning me or replying to my comments! Sorry... didn't mean to ghost those who took the time to read and reply to what I wrote back in October or earlier.

Dak, DipperDave and others are right: Yes, this site has gone nearly dead. Partly because it's winter, but it's more than that, and we do need new blood or at least new discussions.

Last year I was saying that, and I restarted some old threads myself. This season I've been busy with "in real life" stuff, including some people who'd been thinking for months about trying social nudity but "chickened out" in the fall and planned to try getting "psyched up" in the spring for a lakefront cottage visit. Then we had some gloriously warm and sunny late fall weather, so several couples decided "now or never" on a really warm late fall day. Then, surprise surprise, we had another warm day, and another, and then a warm sunny weekend. Mostly friends of friends, not people we know well, but we have a pool and a secluded yard and most people don't, so several nudist regulars we know well asked if they could bring friends to our home for their newbie experience, and then come back, and we were glad to help.

I want to respond to this from Jim:

I'd like to learn more. Most resort staff are experienced nudists, but not all. I've heard of women coming to a resort with an experienced nudist boyfriend and after three or four visits saying, "There's a job posted on the bulletin board, and it comes with free housing, and I'm nervous but would like to try it." It can be a great way to earn college money, cut expenses, and spend lots of time with a boyfriend.

Also, as several said, there's a different "vibe" when someone who doesn't have much experience with social nudity is fully dressed, particularly in nice-looking office clothes, and interacts with nude people. It's not the same as a swimsuit. Women expect our bodies to be noticed when we're at a pool or beach or hot tub wearing much less than normal, but when we're wearing office clothes, even though we expect men to notice our clothes and makeup, it can be jarring for someone new to nudity to learn how to interact with people who have no clothes on and who are expecting we will soon take our clothes off. It's not unusual for our first-time visitors to come straight from work to the lakefront cottage. There's no getting around the truth that a well-dressed woman will attract attention as she undresses, and it takes more time to take off all the items of an office outfit than to pull a T-shirt over our head, unhook our bra, and pull down our shorts.

But there's a bigger issue here. I feel there's an important difference between a resort experience and a beach experience.

Resorts, even those that aren't "clothing optional," often encourage newbies to undress with their "significant other" in private, maybe in a restroom, or their car in the parking lot, or a designated meadow in the trees away from public view, or their rented cabin, and then walk out fully nude after they've gotten used to being nude together.

By contrast, at nearly all nude beaches, people arrive clothed and undress in public view. There's a mix of people in various stages of undress on the beach, from fully nude to topless to wearing a full swimsuit to wearing a T-shirt and jeans. Most clothed people aren't gawkers, but just arrived, are looking for a place to set up, and will soon be undressing since at most beaches they can't be nude in the beach parking lot and have to walk some distance to the nude section of the beach before they can legally undress.

That difference may be no big deal to experienced nudists, but it's a huge deal to those just starting out in social nudity, and I think the inevitable interaction between nude and clothed people at a beach has some of the "vibes" Jim saw at that resort with the staff member on her first day.

(CONTINUED)

No doubt about it: the common resort practice of undressing in a more-or-less private place and walking fully nude into the public areas of the resort has good points.

I know married couples who felt their first resort experience went wonderfully. They checked in at the main office with the experienced nudist couple who invited them, walked through the resort to their neighboring cabins, and giggled a bit during their walk as they passed nude singles and couples and families acting normally, doing all the things they'd do at a textile campground, but doing it with no clothes. The newbie couple undressed in their private cabin, made love as they usually would, and in the "afterglow," got out of bed, took a last look at their clothes, went to the door, took a deep breath, opened the door, walked out, greeted their already-nude friends who had invited them, and got used to seeing their friends nude and being seen nude by them. There's always embarrassment as husbands and wives see and are seen nude by other men and women, perhaps for the first time in many years since their marriage, and learn to accept it is perfectly okay not only to see their friends naked but to enjoy it.

False modesty and guilt take time to overcome, but men and women were made to enjoy seeing each other, so when they spend time nude with trusted friends, eventually husbands accept it is natural and healthy to be attracted to a female friend other than his wife, even if she is fully nude rather than wearing a bikini or a nice dress, and wives enjoy being complimented on their looks by a male friend when both of them are nude. Eventually the wife (usually the hesitant one), after spending time with nude friends, learns to enjoy the experience of warm sun and warm breezes on her nude body, overcomes her embarrassment being nude, and starts to enjoy men appreciating her looks. Eventually most newbie couples agree to be escorted around the resort by experienced friends, which means being seen nude by dozens more people, all of them nude, who they don't know.

But that's married couples who have years, maybe even decades, being intimate with each other.

For younger dating couples visiting a resort, especially those with little experience being nude together, obviously there is tremendous enjoyment undressing together. However, there's often fear, and sometimes real terror, when it comes time for the "moment of truth" of opening the door while fully nude. The fear is worse for women, but plenty of men are also terrified (wrongly) that "things might happen."

At beaches, by contrast, it's normal and expected that even the most terrified and nervous newbies who are brand new to nudity have to experience taking off their clothes in the warm sun and warm breezes of the open beach while both friends and strangers are watching.

Back in college, if friends we invited to the beach asked us to turn around or close our eyes or look the other way, usually we politely declined, explaining how much better it would be for them to undress with us watching and encouraging them. Also, we explained how good it is for a dating couple not only to enjoy seeing each other undressing, but for boyfriends to experience the emotional release of watching me and other female friends undressing and satisfy their natural curiosity about what women who they know look like under their clothes. For girlfriends, we helped them accept it is perfectly fine for men other than their boyfriend to enjoy seeing them nude, and for them to admit to themselves that while it's scary at first to undress while male friends are watching, undressing on a public nude beach helps women experience the "forbidden pleasure" of breaking a taboo, and learn just how fun it is to watch a male friend enjoy seeing us undress, and to admit to ourselves that we enjoy seeing male friends undress, even if we don't enjoy it as much as the guys.

Private resorts can do what they want, but my beach experiences tell me we lose a great opportunity when newbie couples undress in private rather than doing what happens naturally at beaches, undressing with close friends.

For most boyfriends and girlfriends there is an emotional "rush" as they undress in public. Obviously they enjoy seeing each other. That's combined with the "taboo breaking" excitement of men seeing what other female friends look like without their clothes, and for women, as their initial nervousness and embarrassment taking off their clothes with male friends turns to excitement. It helps most women greatly when men who they know and trust encourage and compliment them as they undress, and as they come to terms with the "forbidden pleasure" of admitting that it's not just the men who like seeing them nude. Women also enjoy seeing male friends pull down their shorts, even if they have trouble admitting it and cover up their excitement with nervous giggles.

Maybe some of that was happening with Jim at the resort.

I think I speak for everyone when I say "Glad to see you're back, BB."

I quoted the wrong segment. But to my point: the first time I brought my first wife to a nudist resort, the manager was bottomless. That was her first ever interaction with a nudist. And she found the "sight" of his bottomless state a bit jarring...to the point she had a bit of a hard time getting past it. It did little to alleviate her anxiety, as a newbie.
On the other hand my (current) wife's first ever meeting a resort nudist was a volunteer who was wearing a sarong. That fact did in fact alleviate her anxiety. So that first introduction to the nudist community can be better for newbies if the person doing the introduction is covered; at least initially. One resort manager confirmed that was exactly why she chose to keep her sarong on inside the main office. She found that being naked in front of newbies proved "distracting" to them.

To get back to my ex; after disrobing privately and spending some time naked alone with me, she got "acclimated." Her perception of the bottomless manager then changed; and she was able to re-enter the office and interact with him naked. That's one key difference between the resort and nude beach "scenes." The possibility of "private acclimatization." It can just a bit harder (but not impossible) to achieve when a newbie finds herself (or himself) immediately immersed in a naked beach environment. But...there is also something to be said about "immediate immersion." My resort is "nude-mandatory", and newbies will immediately find themselves in the midst of all naked people. That can provide a "push" to skip acclimatization in order to "blend in." It just depends on one's "readiness to join."

VeryGary, you wrote: "As a Christmas gift to the members of Sunny Day's extended family, may I offer a challenge to each of you?
How did you get started?
In this durable website of ours, which Sunny Day started, there is a section called "My Friends' Writings."

Challenge accepted - well, pre-empted. My story is in MFW at The Long, Slow Journey to Nakedness. http://sunnydaynew.atwebpages.com/frnd025a.html No updates recently, sorry! Covid, and not much is happening as ageing occurs. I regret I have to 'enjoy' naturism 'virtually'.

I want to say more about Jim's resort changing ownership over the years and becoming a swinger place no real nudist would support. Real nudists understand that's not what nudism is about.

It goes back to what JT wrote here:

I think you're on to something important, JT.

Social nudity isn't about swapping or picking up partners, which is what happened to the resort Jim visited. That doesn't require nudity. People do that all the time at nightclubs where clothing is mandatory, and where clothes are a huge part of what men and women use to attract each other.

Social nudity overcomes the inhibitions and false modesty with which most of us are raised, some of us worse than others. Far from "keeping people pure," many well-meaning rules made by strict moms and dads do the opposite by causing young people to be overly interested in the "parts" of the other sex they never get to see.

Social nudity between friends satisfies natural curiosity and in many cases gives a realistic and accurate knowledge of what attractive women or handsome men actually look like without their clothes, makeup, nice hairdo, etc. In my profession I need to dress well, and I do a good job of that, and while I'm physically fit and happy with my appearance both in and out of clothes, there are many "tips and tricks" that people, especially women, can do with clothes to artificially improve their appearance.

I often tell men who are afraid of how they will react at a nude beach that if they're expecting to see a beach full of models, they'll be badly disappointed. Imagine Walmart, but everybody naked, and that's the reality of most nude beaches. A few people are "8s" or "9s," a tiny number are "10s" and stand out anywhere whether they wear clothes or not, but most people are, as we would expect, average.

Even for college students who are younger and often better looking, I tell people considering social nudity that most of their female friends will look much better in a blouse, skirt, heels and makeup on a date night than they will look walking out of the pool or ocean or river fully nude with messed up hair after swimming.

The key word here is "trust."

Social nudity between friends works because we trust each other. For friends who know each other well, and trust each other, it is a very liberating experience for two or more couples to enjoy time together nude. There's no point in denying that there is a natural, normal, and healthy attraction between men and women. Men and women were designed to enjoy seeing each other's bodies.

The great part of social nudity is that going nude with close friends satisfies that natural curiosity about what our friends look like without their clothes, and because my husband is right next to me, and my friends are there with their wives or husbands or boyfriends or girlfriends, while we appreciate each others physical appearance, clear boundary lines are there because our "significant others" are present.

For many of the same reasons, I love swimming, It's a great workout, and helps tone muscles without building them up in ways that look un-feminine, and burns tons of calories without getting hot and sweaty, and cools us off in hot weather. But all the way back in high school, I also learned that swimming is a socially acceptable way for young men and young women to partly satisfy their curiosity about what their friends look like with nearly all of their clothes off.

There really isn't any consistent argument against social nudity for people who are okay with bikinis and speedos. A few inches of fabric cover almost nothing while sending imaginations into overdrive. Taking the swimsuits off satisfies the curiosity that the swimsuits excite. Many clothes are specifically designed to call attention to what's underneath, and that includes many outfits that cover head-to-toe.

Thanks for the compliment, Nudony!

I get it that for someone brand new to social nudity, seeing the resort manager bottomless (I guess that would be a guy with his shirt on but pants off?) would be strange. Most non-nudists understand that some women are comfortable taking their bikini tops off but keeping their bottoms on, but don't consider that a person might be sunburned on the shoulders or chest and need to cover up but not want to "lose the feeling" of nudity, so the bottoms stay bare.

I've sometimes put on a long T-shirt as a coverup at a beach, but if I do that, it's usually the one I came in from the parking lot that is long enough to go below my pubic area, and while I wouldn't wear it in non-nude places without shorts or bikini bottoms, it's long enough that I could.

Most of the time today when I go to a public nude beach that is far away from any facilities and where I might get a sunburn, I'm prepared with a coverup in my beach bag so I don't need to use a T-shirt. But back in college sometimes I enjoyed walking around campus or in my dorm wearing a long T-shirt, short shorts, and no bra since it covered what needed to be covered but not much else, and was very comfortable, and yes, sent a message that I would prefer to be nude. I talked to my boyfriend (now husband) the first time I decided not to wear my bra under my T-shirt while walking back to campus on am early spring day that I'd gotten burned on the beach by spending too long without sunscreen after swimming and I asked if it was okay with him. "Okay with me?" he laughed. "Miss Modesty you aren't. I love it, and the guys will love it too, and you obviously don't mind guys seeing you totally nude, so why would I mind guys seeing you braless in a T-shirt?"

Two other responses:

That is SO important! If all we have in common with someone is nudity, something is wrong.

Nearly everyone we invite to join us nude is a friend, usually a very close friend, or we wouldn't risk inviting them. Most exceptions are when we are close friends of someone who wants to try social nudity and we insist that he (it's almost always a "he") at least try to bring his reluctant wife or girlfriend, who we don't know, to the nude event he wants to attend. Our success stories, when we've had them (often we fail) are when we make friends with the reluctant woman and convince her that we're not strangers but friends, and she should join her boyfriend/husband in something he really badly wants to try. Often that means getting the woman to come to female-only nude swims and tanning times, and then to mixed-gender pool parties where everyone is in a swimsuit, and then convince her to take off her swimsuit.

I get the difference your first wife faced between "acclimatization" and "immediate immersion"

I'm not a fan of pushing people to undress when they're uncomfortable, but what JT wrote about "uninhibited, normalized, innocent, social nudity" is true. I've known American exchange students in Europe who saw a spa and sauna culture with groups of friends and co-workers who may go together after work to a sauna, or go on vacation to a ski resort that includes a warm-up time after skiing in a hot tub or sauna where everyone is not just asked but required to be nude. It can be a great ice-breaker to work all day with a group of people, and then go to a bar after work, or a nude place to enjoy seeing what our friends look like without their clothes.

Nudity in those contexts is normalized in ways it isn't in America, but I'm not sure the word "innocent" applies. I think some Europeans try to push "prudish American guys" to break down their modesty, open up, and have a good time. One of those American guys later invited a female American exchange student to join him at the same Schwimmbad, and cautioned his female friend about German fellow students who had tried to "loosen him up" about nudity. When his female American friend went with him and she was obviously uncomfortable being nude in the sauna, his German friends were nice to her and wanted to avoid driving her away. It actually worked out for her: she didn't like the hot sauna, but she loved swimming nude for her first time, and became a regular at the Schwimmbad, just not the sauna.

I'm going a bit off topic with this...but then again this thread doesn't really have a specific topic!

But yes, the manager just had a T-shirt on because it was rather chilly that morning. And it wasn't quite long enough to cover the entire "length"...which at that time - as a newbie - my wife didn't "view" very favorably.

I've found the "approaches" resort people take to covering up (and I'm only talking about practical purposes of "protection from the cold/heat/sun; not self-consciousness) interesting. For men; it's typically just a T-shirt. Women often choose to be more "creative" about it. I've seen sheer sarongs, see-through shirts, a towel draped across the chest; and many other variations. My wife will (although rarely) wear a bathing suit cover-up left open - like a bathrobe. The "idea" behind it - at least from the nudist women I know - is to "creatively protect themselves"; while at the same time trying to avoid "projecting body-shame." And leaving the better part of the body "naked" (usually from the waist down) does the trick. My wife, for example, does care about people not thinking she's developed "sudden modesty"; hence her leaving the cover-up open.

Some nudists have disagreed with me; but I think "wrapping up from neck to knees", usually with a sarong, is superfluous. The body doesn't need to be "that" covered to protect from the sun or keep warm. But that's just my opinion.

As my daughter used to answer that question: "The sky." And she claims not to like puns!

Not much in the way of nude activities here, other than sleeping and eating breakfast nude before my wife gets up. She does not think nudism is a Christian practice. It is winter, so outdoor activities are limited.

That said, last summer my wife went to help my daughter after our latest grandson was born, so I got a week alone. I laid the new flooring in the living room over a 2 day period while nude and took a short nude hike at a nature preserve.

I hope all have a blessed new year!

Dressed in Jesus' righteousness alone,
BareHare

Thanks everyone for weighing in! I've said this before, but I'll say it again: "social" nudity, even with a long time friend/spouse/partner, and of course all of the "others", is about vulnerability and trust. Since here we talk about "it" rather than do "it", I challenge myself to share the difficult things, not just the easy ones.

I'm sure that the woman handling the office at the resort expected to see nude guests. Certainly she had visited in some way before she took the job. Two men were doing maintenance and grounds keeping work- the younger one clothed, the older one nude. The owner woman visited the office in a skirt and blouse. So clearly it was clothing optional for staff.

This was my first visit to a nudist resort, so I had nothing to compare with. I wanted to honestly portray the chance encounter, somewhat up close and personal, of the new staff person in her first morning of her first day, with a tanned and athletic male guest, in his first venture into a resort office while nude!. We both enjoyed it, from complimentary perspectives, albeit in a "is this really happening?!" sort of way.

Great posts while I was away. Nudony and Jim both commented on resort staff who keep their clothes on. Before talking about clothed vs nude for staff, I want to comment on what Jim said here about both the new office person and the resort owner dressing in a skirt and blouse:

Maybe it wasn't clothing optional for staff in the office where visitors would be greeted? Even though Jim said some outside maintenance workers were nude, if both a newly hired office worker and also the owner wore similar outfits of a skirt and blouse, that's a hint maybe it was the office dress code.

I love skirts except in cold weather, but many young women don't, and need to be told by an employer to wear a skirt or they'll come to work in slacks, jeans, or even shorts. Yes, skirts keep us cooler in warm weather, but in really hot weather can cause trouble. Wearing summer skirts with light fabric and no pantyhose feels great, but even though our legs can "breathe," when sitting down, we need to keep our legs crossed or at least knees together unless the skirt is longer than most women wear today. To safely avoid riding above our knees when sitting, skirts need to go significantly below our knees. Unless a woman is quite petite, five or six inches below the knee can be a comfortable compromise but longer skirts defeat the purpose of keeping cool.

Also, skirts and blouses look good on a physically fit woman but some women feel skirts make them look "dumpy." We can assume anyone working in the office of a nudist resort is okay with men seeing her nude, but even with nudists, double standards aren't unusual of "I don't have a good enough body to wear that outfit" while being willing to let men see her with no clothing at all.

Some women wear skirts or summer dresses or sundresses when they're on their way to beaches or pool parties. They're light, they're comfortable when walking around outside in hot weather, and they can quickly be taken off at either textile or nude beaches.

Especially with first-time women, or women who are still getting comfortable with social nudity, we encourage clothing that makes them feel good, that they will enjoy taking off, and that their boyfriend or husband will enjoy seeing them take off.

Some women want long T-shirts and shorts that are quick and easy to take off. Some women, including me, love the feeling of walking braless in a T-shirt that stimulates our nipples and will be noticed by men. For overly modest women, that can be a great way to help build confidence for her first time taking off her clothes in public. One particularly modest friend in college started going braless under her blouse in the dorm after classes, and braless under T-shirts on weekends, to "psych herself up" for a while before her first nude beach visit. Her boyfriend loved it, her male friends noticed and complimented her, and she said it helped greatly in getting ready to undress and shower with her boyfriend for their first time seeing each other nude on the morning of her first beach visit, and then undressing with our group of friends on the beach.

For other women, "feeling good" means an outfit that makes them feel attractive and will make the experience of undressing in a group more enjoyable. For a beach, that may mean a nice summery blouse and skirt with thin fabric that breathes well and can be worn while walking what can be a significant distance from the parking lot to the beach. For a Friday evening pool party, that may mean the same blouse, heels, and skirt or slacks she was wearing at work before she came to the pool.

Whatever works best to help a woman feel more comfortable is what she should wear when she's still getting used to what is often a very difficult experience.

We want women to say, "Yes, it was really scary at first to take off my clothes at the pool while my friends watched, but it was fun 'forbidden pleasure' to enjoy John from work and Dave from class watching me as I unbuttoned my blouse, unhooked my bra, unzipped my skirt and let it drop, pulled down my panties, and watched Dave and John unzipping their pants and pulling down their shorts. It was scary, but it was also fun, and what was even more fun was seeing how much my boyfriend Ken enjoyed watching me as I undressed, and as I got used to walking around naked, and helping our host pass out food and beverages around the pool. He's been trying to get me to go to these pool parties for months, and I finally agreed, and now I wish I'd tried it long ago."

It's really scary for most women to undress in public their first time. Anything we can do to help women overcome their fear with enjoyment makes it more likely they'll keep coming back.

I am a long time SunnyDay visitor who just read through this thread. Verygary encouraged getting started stories and Nudony brought up the subject of resort staff encounters. I just happen to have something that touches on both! I author a blog on Naturist ethics, and my most recent post is coincidentally autobiographical and has a bit on my first resort staff encounter. So, I offer this link as my two bits.


https://ethicalnaturist.com/?p=433

As someone who played a big part in keeping some of the "heavier" discussions here alive through last summer, I suppose I am partially responsible for things seasonally "dying". ;-) This is my first time checking the board since mid-September - partly because things got really busy for me in "real life" around that time, but also because, as precious and valued as those "heavy" discussions are, they can also be, in a way, emotionally and intellectually "exhausting". Sometimes you just need a break to take life as it comes and let ideas percolate. :-)

Not coincidentally, mid-September was when I finally got the chance to have my own first bona-fide social naturist experience! After waiting and praying for a long time for a good opportunity, one finally opened up, and by God's grace, I got up the courage to drive nearly two hours to the nearest family naturist campground for a day trip! It ended up being a wonderful experience, so much so that I went back the next day (I still can't believe I did that much driving in two days!). While the campground itself, and its community, weren't "perfect" and left a few notable "asterisks" on the experience, for me this wasn't about finding the perfect place to keep visiting again and again. (In fact, I'll be moving soon to another state, and I don't expect I'll have the chance to go back to this particular place.) It was about finally putting theory into practice, and confirming for my heart and mind that the truths we discuss here, and have each in our own ways discovered and grown in, really are for real, are shared by others in the real world, and aren't just some figment of imagination or weird fantasy. Try as we might, without a real-world experience, it's hard to really put to rest the fears and hangups that leave us doubting whether this is really what it's claimed to be, and whether we can "pull it off" ourselves without failing (socially or spiritually) in some terribly shameful, humiliating, or life-destroying way. For me, this was the culmination of a years-long process of learning and processing ideas that have fundamentally changed my life and the way I approach it.

I've been planning (ever since the visit back in September) to do a long writeup (probably in a new thread) of my experience and things it got me thinking about. Interestingly, there's a lot of overlap with the conversation Jim started here (and has touched on for a long time in other threads) about resort staff, mutuality of nudity, and the impacts it can have (for better or worse) on the culture of a nudist establishment. I don't have anything ready to post on that quite yet, but I don't plan to let it drop, as there's a lot of great food for thought in it.

Separately, I think I understand exactly what JT is getting at when he talks about being "profoundly blessed" by the concept of wholesome nudity, yet still having "strong reservations" - questioning how and when to even begin that intellectual conversation, yet already having experienced such a profound and wonderful heart transformation that he knows he can't let it go. Without wanting to project or presume, this sounds like exactly the journey I've personally been on. I feel like the things he's saying are exactly what I said to myself (and eventually, with great difficulty, to others here) starting a few years ago.

When I first posted here three years ago, I'd arrived at a place spiritually and Biblically where I understood and knew - enough to know that there would be no going back, but still with many questions about what it meant for me, and how I and others fit into the puzzle - that wholesome nudity was and should be possible, and is key to victory over the bondage that Satan tries to keep Christians (and especially men) in with regard to the human body, and how we're afraid and told (by both the world and fellow believers) that we "have to" relate and respond to it. Nonetheless, even as I found many good answers and fruitful discussion in "Christian naturist" circles, there was much I didn't feel I could fully agree with or embrace, and that concerned and confused me about where I fit into it all. Now, with some hindsight perspective, I can say that nearly all of those concerns have (at last) been answered by God's grace. I realized that much of what I'd read around here that I didn't think I could agree with was actually a matter of different discussion perspectives framed by different personal journeys and hangups. More often than not, I was in "violent agreement", as people say, with others here whose ways of explaining things sometimes had me fearing the worst about the purity of their perspectives. :-) At the same time, I realized that there were indeed a few voices "out there" in the so-called Christian naturist community that didn't seem quite right - that compromised on the wrong things and in the wrong ways. This was a long journey through much prayer and words, but it was an important one.

Thanks, Unlikely Convert, for your story of your first visit to a nudist resort, and for Tom's link to his first visit to a now-closed traditional nudist resort.

Unlikely, glad you finally "took the plunge" to try social nudity firsthand. When you have time, please post the good and the "asterisks." I like your writing style that expresses your internal emotions and feelings. Many men aren't comfortable talking about their feelings, and since it's mostly men on this site, we don't get much discussion of how men feel.

I don't mean my husband doesn't talk about his feelings. He does, and he's really good in coffee shop conversations with getting husbands or boyfriends to have open and honest four-way discussions (me, him, and the couple considering social nudity) about what they expect from social nudity and explaining, not only to the men but also to their wives or girlfriends, what social nudity is like.

We're both fine discussing social nudity when we personally know the people and can answer heartfelt questions. We love helping friends work through what can often be a really difficult emotional experience of undressing with people other than their spouse or girlfriend/boyfriend, and helping them move from embarrassment to enjoyment, learning to let their natural, normal, and healthy human response to seeing people nude overcome their false guilt and modesty. As you likely learned in your first visit, Unlikely Convert, there's a world of difference between talking about social nudity, or seeing photos or videos of people nude, and actually undressing and being nude with other nude people. As with many things in life, it has to be experienced to be understood and appreciated.

Candidly discussing with a young couple we know well what it will be like for the four of us to be nude together is much different from talking online with people we don't know.

This past summer, two friends we know well came back from their honeymoon, explained that while relaxing on a beach they learned there was a nude beach nearby, almost tried it, but "chickened out" and didn't go. Once back home, they decided to talk with us since they know we enjoy social nudity.

They are a very affectionate couple who do a lot of handholding and she likes to lean against him when sitting next to each other. While talking with them about the usual fears we expect for first-time couples, I noticed she kept crossing and uncrossing her legs, and pulling down the hem of her skirt to be sure it covered her knees, which is often a sign of modesty and discomfort for women.

That was a cue for me to ask, "Julie, I know how much you love your husband. You were affectionate before your marriage and even more now. I know how much you valued saving physical intimacy for marriage and we've already talked about how much you enjoyed undressing on your wedding night. You expected it to be scary and embarrassing, but instead you loved seeing your husband undress, and then you enjoyed seeing him watch you undress. You would have had many of those same emotions if you had taken off your bikini at the nude beach on your honeymoon, and you'll have many of them as you undress with us at our pool. Instead of trying to smooth your skirt here in the coffee shop, visualize in your mind what it would be like to take your skirt off at our pool, after you've already taken off your blouse and your bra, and imagine what it will be like for all four of us to be nude together and enjoy the rest of the day swimming."

Of course Julie blushed and was embarrassed. By pressing her to admit her emotions, that she was both nervous and excited about being nude, all at the same time, we were able to get her to do what she had been afraid to do at the nude beach. Often couples want time to talk privately, but Julie and her husband were an exception and decided to come over to our pool right away before they lost their courage and "chickened out" again. The experience undressing as two couples poolside was wonderful. There are great advantages to experiencing social nudity for the first time in the open air with breezes and sunshine, and learning to overcome the fear that someone might see us nude outside.

We spent most of the rest of that Saturday at our pool swimming and sunbathing. As is usual for first-time couples, after about 10 to 15 minutes of nervousness, Julie learned to accept that I'm perfectly okay with her seeing my husband nude and that it's fine for her to experience the normal attraction men and women have for each other. As we correctly guessed, much of her fear of nudity wasn't so much jealousy of her husband seeing me and other women nude, but her own false guilt. Once she learned that seeing people nude is no more exciting than seeing them in swimsuits, she was able to enjoy the sensual experience of warm sun and warn breezes and warm water caressing her nude body, and that enjoyment was what it took to overcome her modesty and guilt.

I was going to write more about whether staff should be nude or clothed at resorts, but while asking some male friends who are resort regulars to read this thread, they commented on this item by Jim:

Several male friends, and quite a few female friends, commented positively on Jim's point about social nudity being all about vulnerability and trust. We hear often about women feeling vulnerable while nude and needing to trust the nude men they're with. We don't hear that as much about men, so what Jim said is great. Maybe it's male bravado, or most men being less uncomfortable with nudity than women so its easier for men to take off their clothes, even in mixed groups, and get used to women seeing them nude.

A bigger issue is many men are uncomfortable discussing their feelings of being vulnerable while nude, and when they do, they get criticized. If their feelings of being vulnerable are based on modesty, they're told "man up and get over it." If they worry "something might happen," men are told "that won't happen," and usually that's true, but if it does, they get accused of all sorts of bad motives.

That doesn't happen with women. When we discuss our feelings of being vulnerable while nude, other women encourage us by saying, "Me, too! I can relate!" And it's not just women. When men hear a woman talking about their feelings of being vulnerable, or related feelings of modesty, guilt, body image, not looking "good enough," etc., decent men who want to help encourage her by telling her it's fine to be nude, that she looks good, that it's perfectly fine for her to look at nude men, etc.

If in doubt about the double standard, ask this question. What's your first thought when you see a woman who just undressed using her hands to cover herself on a nude beach? What's your first thought if a man does the same thing? Many assume the worst about the man, that he is aroused, not that he's overly modest and needs encouragement to accept that being nude is okay.

Just about the only time I see a man being encouraged to open up about his vulnerabilities is if a first-time couple come to a beach. Sometimes as their female friends undress, the women remind the first-time couple it's okay for the man to enjoy seeing his female friends undress, and that it's normal for him to feel a bit of jealousy as men enjoy seeing his girlfriend or wife take off her clothes, but that he should feel just as complimented when men notice her nude on the beach as he feels when men notice her wearing a nice dress at a nightclub or a nice skirt and blouse in the cafeteria.

I've done it myself. When male friends don't seem to be taking well to men noticing their wives or girlfriends, I like to remind the couple, "Mike, I understand Ginny is nervous about her first time being nude and you want to defend her when men notice her, but we're at a nude beach and people look. Still, Mike, I saw how, after you and Ginny were both nude and holding hands, you looked at me and our other female friends as we undressed. And Ginny, let's not try to play naive innocent girl: I saw you watching as my husband and our other male friends undressed. All of that is natural, normal and healthy. We're young adults, and we were created to enjoy seeing each other. Just accept, Ginny, that Mike is just as new to nudity as you are, and it's just as normal for him to enjoy seeing women without their clothes as it is for you. It may take a few hours or a few visits, but it won't be long, Ginny, before you enjoy it when men notice you walking down the nude beach, or walking out of the water after a swim."

Sadly, we need to admit that men with bad motives love to read about women struggling with modesty, and it's not just bad websites online. At beaches, I have to tell first-time women that getting completely nude is important, and it's important to undress soon after arrival, because a woman who seems to be struggling with her modesty and her fear of undressing attracts gawkers. A confident woman who doesn't seem embarrassed about her body may attract hidden cameras, but gawkers aren't going to approach her on a beach.