Ok, just wanna say, yes it feels pathetic trying to control people around you... But it's just for one of a few reasons: 1. A rush 2. Being bored 3. Anger 4. Other reasons I don't remember...
Which I don't know why I have so much anger, or jealousy...I think the jealousy is not because I give a **** about another person, but it's something inside of me.
I feel like I can't be happy BECAUSE OF others. I feel like I can only be happy in isolation. Just me. I seriously dislike people... Somebody might say I am disrespectful but I can't even see it... It's like I don't even know what they're talking about. I couldn't care less about people's approval. That's got me in a bit of trouble throughout my life.
It's like they see things I can't see... Or maybe I see beyond what they see. It's strange. I react differently to things.