I disagreed with your theory. Also i dislike order, people feel safe when there is order. I prefer chaos, chance, the randomness of the universe is what i embrace, not try to categorize and cotrol every aspect of my life or others. Any animal is most interesting when they run out of options and their instincts fail them. It's the same with humans. When they have nothing to rely on or believe in, that's when they become interesting. A rubics cube is a good analogy. You can twist and turn it but untill you smash it apart you will never see the whole, the parts of it's sum. Order is an illusion, something we cling onto to feel better, some even tell themselves there is a grand plan for everyone. Only a delusional idiot thinks anything has any true order or that we are actually in control of anything.

It's funny that you think you have a choice in the matter. As if the thoughts of your ego are relevant or even have any influence over your subconscious. Your thoughts are processed first by your subconscious and then by you. Most of what you do and say is dictated by a superior consciousness without you ever knowing. You are no more than a slave to the will of your subconscious. And yes.. I do enjoy torturing you with this knowledge.

All you've done is confirm the facts. The ego resists and lives in denial while the subconscious lives in a state of order. Order is not control. The subconscious seeks no personal control over others. That is the ego. I've told you this...

Like Dr Robert has told you before.. you don't have free will. Everything you said is common. The ego seeks a more random existence but the subconscious lives in a state of order you have yet to comprehend correctly. Something can have order without it being directly related to control. Order is simply structure.

And it really doesn't matter if you agree or not. What I preach is commonly practiced with or without the consent of Hexi. As it has been for over 20 years.

It's fascinating to watch your ego struggle with this. It's exactly what your ego is programmed to do. Then you admit seeking structure but you yourself don't like structure... yet you admit seeking it for a since of comfort? Or rather you admit that you unconsciously seek structure.

You are right about one thing. You control nothing. Your ego may tell you different but that still means nothing. The aspects of your life are controlled by a superior conscious and unlike you and your silly rebellion.. it has order. It has to have order.. it's responsible for keeping you ALIVE. You can't even hold a job.. more or less regulate your heartbeat or circulatory system.

I'm not asking you to believe me. Read a few books on the matter.. do some research. I enjoy the fact that some of you will in fact do the research and to your horror (why horror I don't know) you'll realize the truth. Reading books is better than internet searches IMO.

I'm shocked you tell others to read books when you can't even comprehend what you read. You sound like toby now, how pathetic.

Let me explain what i meant. Is the subconscious in control of my impulses and behaviour? Yes. Does the conscious mind try to rationalize my impulses? Yes. The point i was trying to make is that even though there is structure and order within the subconscious, the conscious mind tries to control the impulses and understand and this is what i find pointless. Your subconscious dictates thje impulses behind your actions and ensures your survival, to claim otherwise is delusional and trying to bring order into that chaotic combination is not what i try to do, i embrace the conflict and rather than try to fight my impulses, i analyze them to better understand them.

It's really hard to explain and there are a lot of theories out there. Neuroscience books will flat out tell you that Neuroscience is only interested in the mechanisms of the brain. Studying how the "software" of the brain works is psychology which, after much thought, is probably more of an art than a science. Because it is not as factual as neuroscience.. so naysayers often try to kill the good ideas or rather their egos do.

Your conscious mind can access some of the same memories that the subconscious can but they are two completely different parts of the same brain. The subconscious can send messages to the conscious but the conscious cannot access the subconscious.. yet the subconscious is always aware. The only time you can really receive direct communication from the subconscious is in dreams. Other than that you can only distinguish subconscious thoughts from conscious thoughts through mental training.

I'm excited.. I get to learn all about myself and while others get all sad.. I feel good. There's some part of me that loves me and takes are of me.. it makes you understand that it was never some God or something but it was always a better part of yourself. You can use your spirituality to define the messages of the unconscious if you wish but I rather enjoy knowing the truth.

It's hard to put into words what i mean and i just realized what i wrote sounds confusing. I get your meaning, i really do and i agree with the theory but i look at it a bit differently. Also, when you dream your brain releases DMT, which is the most powerful hallucinogenic known to man so i have my doubts about what dreams really are. If you've never taken any hallucinogenics you won't understand what i mean and that's fine but you should try as it will change your view on things for sure.

Are we going to take LSD and go to the spirit world or something? I don't think so. My power is already fueled by knowledge.

Your dreams are the only time when your unconscious speaks.. indirectly to your conscious. Other than that all suggestions are done without conscious knowledge.

You experienced a powerful emotion in your dream? It was caused by the same part of your brain that regulates your heart and every other aspect of your body, the unconscious.

Hexi, you know a chemical is released into the brain but you don't know why or how? You will never know but do trust that maybe.. just maybe your unconscious is a whole hell of a lot smarter than you and it is the reason for all your feelings, ect.

Now if you wanna say that maybe God is your unconscious.. than I'll accept your spirituality but by the rules of logic.. that voice in your head that always tells you the most reliable course of actions to take... is your unconscious mind.

If you can concede your ego and train yourself to be more aware of it.. it folds all your knowledge. I've not only been using unconscious suggestions on people but now I am aware of unconscious signals I send people and how to prevent them all. How to accurately cloak myself from even the unconscious mind. It goes way beyond normal manipulation. I plant seeds of thought in peoples minds that sprout days later. In doing so I can accurately predict the future of that persons probably mental state and not only that.. but know on an unconscious level the more intricate details of their functioning.

Have you ever damaged a persons subconscious? Consciously they aren't even aware of the emotional stress you are flooding them with. Days later the unconscious floods over into their conscious sending waves of emotional distress at them. But then you switch your subconscious suggestions to all positive and friendly. It also works to fix them as well. So you can fix their future moods.. I like it.

Tell me a relatively short story. Make it something powered by your imagination. Anyone. tell me a story or a reoccurring dream. I want to train.

I wouldn't call it the spirit world, unless you suggest that when you dream you also go to a spirit world. Also, only take organics, like shrooms, and none of that manufactured stuff. DMT is maded by a chemical mixture. Why? one can only guess, perhaps our brain is trying to expand it's understanding of the universe it's in. Since it's done while the unconscious is in control, maybe taking hallucinogenics is something good for you? Afterall, it's what the brain does on it's own.

A recurring dream? Post-apocalypse is a recurring theme. It's not a science fiction kind, mind you, just the kind where the world of humans has gone wrong.

Spare me your ego or rather spare me these conscious lies you tell yourself as I have no interest in self illusion.

Lets stop calling it the unconscious and call it the "super conscious" instead. That way you'll see "super" in front and instantly think "superior" and better grasp what I am saying. Also your ego will be enraged by this demotion in status... which is impossible for you and simple for me. How interesting...

The super conscious does not sleep. If it did you would stop breathing and die.

The super conscious does not ask questions as its mental capacity is far beyond asking. It simply knows best because it is far superior to the distroted and often dysfunctional conscious mind it attempts to maintain.

The super conscious programs thoughts into the conscious mind. Don't worry. Chances are you aren't listening to it at all. Which is why your life is crap.

We thought it was an inner child but really it was the adult mind in us and we are the children. You've always been aware of it yet you have never known what it was. So you made up stupid fairy tales t o try to explain it. Each of you have a fairy tale story to explain it but really they are all lies the ego tells itself because the ego CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH.

Tom Cruise would be proud. Which to me means.. absolutely nothing!

Oh and Dragontongue.. I didn't read your post. LOL It's the simple things that get me in life.

Keep trying wolfie, you'll get there eventually. Or not, oh well.

Nice defensive stance. It'll serve you well on your way to oblivion.


http://www.nytimes.com/books/first/l/lakoff-philosophy.html

I don't need to defend myself from such elementary bull****. Get some new material and put some effort into it. Do you actually think you're clever?

I think Dr. Robert Lang MD is clever. I think him and a lot of like minded research doctors know at least how to give me structure of thought.

See I don't just jump into crap like you do. I refine my knowledge through education if I want to know more about something. Grab a few books and find the ones that are more appealing and read them first. Then read the others I found less appealing to see what aspects they can add... even though my ego does not like it.

Everything is just math. You learn a formula as a way of thinking. So everything in life has a formula from which you can decode truths.

I read books of learning to expand my knowledge. So when I have opinions or theories.. much of my theories are based off of supported evidence. I keep my books of knowledge as well. That way I have reference points. I am well educated and my ways of thinking reflect the structures I have learned.

I structured thought and my structured thought is reliable. My ego often collides with it but I have learned ways around the uglier parts of me.

Like when Dr Robert mentioned our egos colliding and how ugly that is. He didn't really say it was us but more an aspect of us that was acting bad. So in doing that he separates us as a whole from our ego driven actions.

oops lol

See, you're the hero of the movie. The champion of all that is good and just. I'm the short guy with a hood up, smoking a cig and having a sword on my shoulder, snorting at you because your greatness is meaningless to me, it has no value whatsoever in my view. You bash in your glory, i move on to the next thing that interests me enough to put effort into, a drifter. Almost all your obsrvations and analyzes have been wrong as you seem to assume i want to be like you, i really, really don't.

You always go back to thinking someone is trying to "project their thoughts" on you. There is some trigger in your head that always causes you to rebel... It's easier to run.

Anyway you express yourself just fine and really.. only you are backing yourself into the corner. Or do you not remember saying "I'm the short guy with a hood up, smoking a cig". Converted into real thought you said.. "I'm not as big and strong as you but I'm interesting and special in my own way." I agree. I don't want you to be me either..

You judge them just as bad as they judge you. Why don't you just get over it and be better than them already?

Also you have that rebelling child syndrome still. Every time someone of certain stature attempts to influence you.. you assume the defensive position (as you are mentally trained to react to the stimuli) and run away.

I made an AMV to express myself after I got divorced. I spent so much time on this videos concept that the actual video I released was really just the beta version. If you had seen the anime it was spawned after and then watched the video.. you could see the double and triple meanings of many things I added. My point is.. maybe you should express yourself more.. regardless of how defensive you are. If you express yourself more artistically.. people may warm up to you. Cause really they just don't understand. I mean think about it.. Narcs outnuber us 100/1 and they are out there right now actively preying on people every day. Psychopaths prefer to be alone and seldom prey on anyone they don't have to. Are you a real threat? No, you are just a victim of a label.

http://www.animemusicvideos.org/members/members_videoinfo.php?v=27125

haha, i said that because at that time, i did have my hoodie on with the hood up and a cig in my mouth as i was about to go out for a smoke. I didn't actually think much of the metaphor, the last part was more important. You analyze what i write too much at times, other times you miss the point on purpose and use the toby tactic to try and annoy me, it's amusing. :)

It's easy to just move on and ignore people as i don't form attachments to anything, that's not running away. I spend time doing something as long as it interests me and then i move on. It suits me fine and i'm not gonna defend it.

I don't seek the approval of others to validate my existence. Like i said, it's meaningless to me.

Ha! That sounds so much like me. Can't form attachments to anything. Going through life like a wheel...But still, I don't seek validation from anyone either. I couldn't care less...

Neither of you possess the mental capacity to find your purpose in life. Your life is meaningless as you will never have the capacity to define it. Trapped b y your own ignorant and blind egos you are ****ed to suffer till the end of time.

Live with the knowledge that there are those among you who are superior to you, who rose where you have fallen, and who will never see you as anything more than you are.. wasted potential destroyed by ego.

Ka cha!!

I will, live that is, without the validation of others. Shame you will never accomplish that as you cannot function without others feeding your vanity, quite ironic.

I am.. compelled to pursue you, Hexi.

I'm sorry I keep backing you into the corner. I just have this drive to.. hunt you. For some reason I am seeing you as weak and inferior. It makes me feel compelled to have aggression towards you. I don't know if it's an attempt to help you or an attempt to just hunt you because I see you as weak. But for whatever reason I acknowledge it's my fault we have been having these conflicting conversation.

But I will not deny my desires even though I logically understand them. I am compelled to inflict certain pains on you. As if to punish you for being weak and acting out of line.

I really believe I can fix you through physical violence. i wouldn't employ that method against them but against you.. it would be fun to break your ego. Nothing like hurting someone in order to help them. It's all love though. No anger like you.. no dwelling on dark thoughts and being stuck in the void. I left that behind. Enjoy!

Really? Oh, goodie! And here I was a bit ticked at myself for telling you a dumb dream like that just because I was bored. ^^ Life is good to me sometimes!

Cool! I'm up for that. How's this?

I dreamed that I was in my mother's room, walking past that tall, wall-mounted mirror she has next to the closet. Something in the mirror caught my eye, and I turned to look. The first thing I saw was my reflection. It didn't look like me. This girl was so beautiful! I couldn't even look at her face at first. She wore my clothes with a style I could never manage. Her hair was so dark and pretty... all soft black waves and curls... and then I saw her eyes. They were red. I was... entranced, I suppose you could say. I couldn't move or look away. I didn't want to. And when I realized that, she smiled. It was not a particularly nice smile, but it was beautiful all the same. And as she smiled--so slowly--I felt myself changing. I felt myself straightening up, standing more confidently. I felt my hair becoming longer, heavier. I felt her smile growing on my face. I felt myself--the person I had been--dying. And I felt powerful. Strong, beautiful, confident, triumphant. I laughed softly with my reflection in the mirror--and woke.

Ok, just wanna say, yes it feels pathetic trying to control people around you... But it's just for one of a few reasons: 1. A rush 2. Being bored 3. Anger 4. Other reasons I don't remember...

Which I don't know why I have so much anger, or jealousy...I think the jealousy is not because I give a **** about another person, but it's something inside of me.

I feel like I can't be happy BECAUSE OF others. I feel like I can only be happy in isolation. Just me. I seriously dislike people... Somebody might say I am disrespectful but I can't even see it... It's like I don't even know what they're talking about. I couldn't care less about people's approval. That's got me in a bit of trouble throughout my life.

It's like they see things I can't see... Or maybe I see beyond what they see. It's strange. I react differently to things.