i have been seeing this man for 2 years now and i am allways confused about being with him or leaving him.one thing i dont think i ever could do is even if i could finish the affair with him i dont thinkk if i can finish the friendship with him coz we r good friends too.
he has been married for 5years now and he is not happy,they dont have any kids yet becos the wife dosnt want to .the wife is on her early 20s and the man is early 30s.where i have 2 kids and divorced and on my late 20s.he says he loves me and i do belive him that he dose love me and he has told me few times that he wants to leave his wife but i have encouraged him not to do the mistake i did(divorce)and i do love him too very much .he is a good man he offerd me to marry me (since we r muslim and men can have second wife too)and he still wants me to marry him and i asked him what is gona happen to ur wife.he says when she knows ,she is gona leave me .he says he dosnt love his wife,they both have diffrent goals in life and he says them 2 r not sexualy attracted to each other.but the problem is i am confused, so confused i dont know how to explain this but ,i do love him we have great sex life together ,he is helpping me with everything,he loves my kids to bitss. he is secured financialy, he spends more time with me than his wife.i tried many many times befor to end this relationship but we couldnt ,i couldnt ,he couldnt and we decided to go with the flow.anyways my question is if i love him why the thought of marrying him freaks me out and beside i dont wana be his second wife.what i,m scared of is if the wife knows anything about this (as i knw her )she will leave him and i dont think if i can marry him becos the thought of it makes me to leave him now befor its in that stage.what i,m trying to say is, i like us 2 to be the way we r,i dont wana marry him i wana be with him for the time being and wana marry someone els in the future,and i dont want him to leave his wife coz if he dose ,i cant marry him and i dont know why .i,m a bit scared too coz if the wife knows ,she will deff leave him and i would be responssible for it.in another hand the thought of not being with him scares me .i cant not do not to be with him i want him as muuch as he wants me but i,m not sure if this feeling stays permanant from my side.please help .i just dont know what to do .
I think you shouldn't worry about the future. Today is enough for today. Be happy with what you have, be blessed with your children and a man who loves you. Don't feel obligated to the man unless he's obligated to you. Think of him as a boyfriend.