Unstable emotions and the pursuit of understanding
My emotions are constantly amplified, I am never a little sad, nor a little angry. Since I was twelve, I have been developing what I like to call an "intellect". I have not been trying to master and control the world around me, but attain any sense of understanding. What truly is intellect? Do you really need to be intelligent to have or create one? There is an obvious difference between intelligence and being smart. Am I just someone that is simply just a bit superior to the norm and was held in high regard to myself strictly because of that? Am I not as intelligent as I would like to believe? Or is this simply my mind examine all possibilities? Is it a lack of self-confidence? I am a very confused and lost fifteen year old boy. I think I need some help with my thoughts, or mind, or life, or what-have-you. Is it my emotions ruling my thoughts? If that's true then why do I act like a Vulcan? Is there something wrong with me? Is it suppression? Repression? Depression? Aggression? Why am I so naturally violent? I just want some answers, I just want to understand. Is there even clear answers for my questions?
Re: Unstable emotions and the pursuit of understanding
Your hormones are going crazy about now. I believe the chemical balance in your head is unstable during this time of your life. Your body is going through a lot of changes in very rapid succession. It takes a while for the brain to properly adjust to all of these changes.
Now here's the real question.
Do you want medication to try and stabilize now? It could have detrimental effects on the future development of your brain if you take mind altering drugs like anti depresents now.
Anti Depresent drugs can be extrodinarly dangerous. I took prozac when I was 17 to help combat my depression. Instead of helping it made me.. well insane. I became highly paranoid and tried to kill someone. Inverse affects are common for me.
So drugs are made to fix your brain should you choose such a route. It is better for the ego to acknowledge weakness and look for ways to stabilize. Rather than deny there ever being a problem and continue down the slippery slope.