I’m in a very odd situation. I'm 27 years old female.
I was with my ex for almost 2 years when I found out that he had some affair when i was with him...we broke up in a very bad way and i didn’t stop calling him and texting him. Asking him to come back. But he never replied and said i have to forget him. Finally i stopped calling him and 4 months after i received a bouquet of flowers with no name saying this: Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. Love never ends. I found out it was him but i didn’t do anything. 5 days after i received another bouquet with his name and how much he misses me, and losing me is like losing his heart and he knows that he hurt me a lot...i sent him an e-mail saying thanks for the flowers but i don’t understand why?...after 10 days i received a letter saying how much he regrets his actions, how painful were those months that in his dream world I’ll be the one beside him, that he loves me, he wanted to answer my calls but he though he didn’t deserve it and still do. So i wrote him an email saying that how much pain he caused me and i told him if i give him a chance would he be honest and royal...he wrote back saying he's so sorry to cause me that much pain and he hopes to see me soon and to talk to me in person but he needs time to think about things i told him. I said ok i hope to see him soon too...it’s been a week and he didn’t give me an answer!! I mean couldn’t he think during those 4 months!? Do i give him more time or forget about him! I do love him but I’m not sure what his intentions are.
It's impossible to tell you what you should do. You really have to ask yourself what you want.
You have to ask yourself what you can endure so you can determine whether he is worth having a relationship with.
People rarely change their behavior unless something really pivotal happens in their lives.
Honestly, one should never ask relationship advice from others. No one here knows you or the person in question. There can be various reasons for why people do what they do and giving advice without knowing anything of the person is, in my opinion, a mistake. You should think it rationally. Anyone can claim anything and say they are sorry but in love, there is no but.
well I want to know Dr. Robert's opinion...
"This page is for comments and discussion. Please do not pose questions to dr. robert here."
If you want to ask Dr Robert his opinion then send him an email: Dr.Robert.Saltzman "at" gmail.com.
Good Luck. :)
I did and I recieved an e-mail saying :
This is a good question for the doctor robert forum and I suggest that you post it there:
How long it takes usually to get an answer from Dr. Robert ?
On this forum? He doesn't usually answer on here, although he does sometime, it's really just for others to answer your question. :)
I'm quite shocked that Dr. Robert doesn't sit here all day, answering asinine questions. It is his forum afterall,so it's his responsibility to do so.
It's very difficult to think clearly when your emotions are boiling. Take a very long, very hot bubble bath, and drink a glass of wine.
Ask yourself what you love about this man. Ask yourself what you do not love about him. Ask yourself if you really love him or just love the idea of being in love. Ask yourself if you are a complete person, in and of your own right. If you are not, you are not ready to pursue any relationship. Ask yourself if you knew the world were ending in 39 minutes, would he be on the list of people you would call. Really?
Above all else, be true to yourself when you answer. When you get out of the tub, you will know what to do with him.
Toby, now do you get Hexi's sarcastic sense of humor? If not, why not just kill yourself?
And stop sucking up to Dr. Rob. Unless you really mean it, that is.
Yawn all you like, Toby. You really love playing the fool, don't you? Did you learn that from Jesus too?
You should give him another chance… If you are a masochist. A word to the wise: judge people by their actions first and not by their words or justifications or bouquets. He cheated on you, he never replied to your initial entreaties for reconciliation and he isn’t promptly replying now either. If he really wanted you he would have gotten back with you immediately. Dump him and get on with your life sweetheart. Unless you secretly enjoy these pointless, sadomasochistic games. In that case, knock yourself out.
I want to cry...I got over him and then he came back and nothing really happend..I want to tell him to get lost but i dont know why i cant
I can't know for sure, but it sounds to me like he is hedging his bets. He wants to keep you around in case whatever else he is doing turns out to be not that great. This happened a lot with my ex, it was very confusing. Things were going along well and he woul dpick fights with me and get angry so he could justify his affairs. Then sooner or later the other woman would disappoint him in some way and I was the greatest woman in the world again. I didn't know why we were hainv problems, I thought I needed to work on myself or the relationship to fix it and he was happy to lead me around like that to buy himself more time to check out all his options. My point is that we tend to know early on what someone is about and we choose to ignore it. You have all this information you need now to make a decision. When we blame ourselves for the failure of a relationship it makes it really hard to let it go... to accept defeat. But maybe this has nothing todo wtih you, except taht you chose to ignore teh warning signs until now. The drama can be fun but you'll know when it's time to go because it just won't seen that interesting anymore and you'll realize taht you don't have to "get it". Sometimes there is nothing to "get". He's not a real person. Again, I could be wrong... just my 2¢. Tara