Re: Conditioned self-censorship and other self-defeating behaviors: How do you change?
I don't know if my response will help you because there is not enough question in your question to read the motivation in it, but you learn to change your behaviour the same way you learn anything else in life, I think. Observe how others react in similar situations, evaluate whether their reactions benefited them (or those around them) or not, and mimic those reactions that worked well for others. Controlling one's behaviour requires constant vigil - be aware of what you do and aware of its impact on others as well as yourself.