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Aspergers? Narcisstic traits? Is there hope for the individual.

Dear All
Has anyone gone through similar,can there be a positive outcome. Lived apart for 1yr due to 47yr old partners bursts of anger,emotional abuse, lack of feeling, jealousy,not allowing me out in his company regularly told me how ugly certain parts of my body were, my two adult sons were not worthy of his company,his hatred of children,when at home shut himself in bedroom and wanted me to do same,when out got very drunk and gambled,would also give women in street and public places the come on in front of me the list is endless.Frequent physical and emotional abuse all through his childhood, his step sister, a lovely lady, was sexually abused by his father and his mother is a timid soul who does his bidding.I asked him if his father sexually abused him and instead of getting angry he looked out the window then turned and sat down,putting his palms on his thighs he quietly said, There was no sexual abuse.His response made my heart sink and my stomach churn,iam quite sure his body language and unusual quiet tone of voice was telling me that he was sexually abused His farher died 14yrs ago at new year time making this time of year with him hell on earth.Is he living in a constant state of emotional distress?
Why are so many of his symptoms similar to Aspergers and Narcissistic Personality? Can he be helped to overcome? Or should i run for the hills and save
myself.I have gone through the stages of denial and anger at the moment i am sad but starting to look for answers.
Thankyou for taking the time to read this, i hope someone can provide some insight.