Hey Whitewolf. I am intrigued by your description of yourself. I recognize the traits you described in several people I know, one of which is my dad.
I always wondered how he could be so cold and mean to me and my mom at times. Knowing about the nature of sociopaths, it calms me down a bit because it gives me an explanation to his behaviour.
I wonder though, do you never love someone? Why did you get married? Why did you have kids? Is love the reason? Do you love your family in any way?
I don't live at home anymore and I am **** glad. My parents live separated. It does however seem that my dad is genuinely interested in how I am doing, and does offer me advice and does his best in making my life comfortable. Would you ever be like that to your kids?
I see my daughter as an extension of myself. My genetic influence is strong in her. Even her personality is like mine as a child. I suffered a great deal as a child. I'm proud to say she has been well guarded from such. Do I love her? I have a mothers love for her. She is the only individual in my life that can provoke powerful emotions from me. She is my gift to this world. The ultimate purpose in my existance. I would not hesitate to die for my child and woe to thee who would harm her in my presence.
Children are sacred to me. They are never to be hurt. Spank them if you would like but take no hand to anything but their bottoms. Women have this same protection in my eyes. No matter what she said or how many times she hit me I never hit my ex wife back. There is no honor in hurting a woman or a child. I do not collapse to emotional desires and break my code. It has been severaly tested in the past.
If your father sees you as an extension of himself than I am sure he loves you.